Whats more American than Football and Porn?

They snap the ball! Kurt Warner drops back, his offensive line fighting off the Pittsburgh blitz, he looks left sees nothing. He looks right, his man is covered. One of the Defensive Linemen has slipped the block and is rushing towards Kurt, he starts to scramble and BAM! you get an eye-full of full frontal male nudity with some chick ready to enjoy a healthy serving of meat popsicle.

Apparently thats what happened to some people in Arizona who were watching the Super Bowl. The jazzy music kicked in, a man got his pants unzipped and then a certain PornaRIFIC! act was performed and then Parents began an uproar right after they Tivo-ed it of course.

But whats better than getting football with my porn or is it porn with my football? Either way, someone got interrupted. The guy that was popping a boner to football was like "hey! What the hell, now I have to consentrate all over again just to get this level of hardness! Damn it!" And the guy watching the football and getting bored was like "Alright! Porn! Pass the Guacamole Dip!" And the Father sitting in his living room with his son was like "Junior, go play outside. Me and your Mother really need this commercial break. So go outside Junior."

So I ask. Whats more American than Football and Porn? I mean, doesnt those two things completely summarize American society to a tee? What sport do we have that no one else in the world has and yet we call ourselves world champs? Football. What industry do we dominate in the online market? Porn. I mean, we play Football and the rest of the world calls it Futbol and yet we say 'fuck you world' and call it soccer and then say "we're taking Football for our Past Time, fuckers."

Only in America can you get Football with your Porn, or Porn with your Football. Either way, someone is happy and it will be only a matter of time before you get it in a happy meal.